Thank you for not breeding

I'm sitting at my desk today, minding my own business, when I spot a Russian/Israeli gal I work with walking toward my office.  Having listened to her wicked cough all week I began hoping she wasn't coming to see me; naturally (you all know the drill) she was.  Since I am one of the few employees with Acrobat Distiller on my computer to convert documents to .pdf files, from time to time she asks me to convert something for her husband, which I am always happy to do.  She usually e-mails me her request with the file(s) attached, but since she is deathly sick (or at least sounds that way) she felt the need to come into my office and give me the files via a memory stick, bringing her germs with her.  And of course, there is no Lysol anywhere to be found.  If I get sick I swear to fucking god I'll burn her house down...

Every other week or so this gal is afflicted by some sort of illness, the result of having 2 young children.  Another 'con' in the debate over whether or not children are worth the hassle (despite people breeding like rabbits, 'con' is ahead by a wide margin).  See, most people can't afford to take the day off of work and stay home with their sick children, because in reality they can't afford to have children.  Technically they can -- they are able to put a roof over their head, clothing on their back and food in their mouth, but are living paycheck to paycheck and cannot afford to miss work.  A co-worker of mine is a perfect example of this.  He and his wife either had an overwhelming desire to bear a child, felt compelled to do their part to keep overpopulating the planet, or just wanted something without thinking it through (like adopting a puppy on a whim) because they weren't financially ready for one.  After she gave birth, his wife stayed home with the baby.  After a while, they realized they couldn't get by on just his salary alone.  Fortunately his supervisor at the time agreed to let him work from home 3 days a week -- his wife could work her old job those 3 days a week and he would "work" while watching the baby.  This went on for a few months until he got a new supervisor who wasn't as sympathetic and told him he had to be in the office 5 days a week.  My co-worker obviously wasn't happy, but who told him to have a kid before doing some budgeting and determining whether or not they could afford to live on 1 salary?  However, the client he works with wanted someone in the office before 9 a.m. so he was able to work out a deal where he works from 6:00 a.m. to 2:00 p.m. (without taking lunch).  Now his wife can work afternoons to supplement their income.

So you have people who cannot afford to be docked a day's pay while staying home with their sick kid so the contagious child goes to school and spreads their germs to the other kids.  Eventually, the kids get the parents sick, who then bring their germs and spread them around the office.  It just gets passed around because of these young'uns, eventually nailing those of us who were smart enough to remain barren and childless.  To sum up:

sick kid not kept home because parents can't afford day off + passing germs in school creating more sick kids + eventually passed on to a parent = passed on to innocent co-worker

It's even worse if you're a parent.  I get sick often enough being a single guy who spends the majority of the year not swapping spit with anyone, why the fuck would I want a kid who is always getting infected by other kids increasing the number of illnesses I have to deal with each year by passing theirs on to me as well?  Take friend Bruce.  His daughter Fiona ('the time traveling child from another dimension') had a nasty stomach ailment that resulted in her body expelling matter both orally and anally.  She got over it but then his wife Kate and other daughter Rowen had to deal with it.  When he told me about his ailing family I started laughing, being the sadistic fuck I am, knowing it was only be a matter of time before he was sitting on the can while puking in a bucket.  Sure enough, a day later Bruce was suffering from a distant cousin of 'Montezuma's Revenge'.

So do yourselves and the rest of us a favor: don't have any more fuckin' kids.  And if you insist, keep them home when they are sick, and when you get sick from them stay home as well so you don't pass it on to your innocent co-workers like me.  Planet-overpopulating ass clowns...

Here's a website that might help...

Comments

[Rhi]

My name is Rhi and I am a planet poplulating ass clown.

Spoken like a man who has no children.

Lets see how many days i have missed from work in the last 5 years due to sick children: um.......how about 3. and that is five YEARS. I don't send my children to school sick and I don't go to work sick. Perhaps my children just have good immune systems.

Schools now send them home when they are sick and don't allow them to stay (esp if they have a feve or are vomiting).

Some people (children included) are just sickly, I don't think it has anything to do with not staying home or staying home or being in school or not. Younger children are sicker more frequently bc they put almost anything in their mouths and typically don't have good hygiene.

You cannot lump everyone into one pot when you mention large children (or children at all) and what you seem to notice is not even the norm. And with five children you would think I would have typically one of every kind of child.

[Stephanie]

I have to agree with Rhi on this one... Granted, I only have one, and will only have one. He's 2½ and has been sick twice in his life. Once when his grandmother got him sick and once when he just ended up sick. Then again, I've been nursing him all of his life so that may attribute to the lack of sicknesses he has had. Also, he doesn't attend daycare because I do stay home with him.

OTOH--my husband is constantly sick. Apparently people at news stations swap spit, have orgies, something! constantly because there is always a few sick at a time. Hubby brings that home to us--but the baby never gets it; Mommy does.

Don't blame it on the kids, or the parents...blame it on people who refuse to wash their hands and practice good hygiene. ::cringe::

[Creepy]

That would be "planet over-populating" ass clown. LOL

Your 5 children have only stayed home sick from school a total of 3 days in the last 5 years? You must have remarkable children, seeing as how they each average well below 1 sick day a year. Three sick days in 5 years for a single child would be remarkable. Who's the father, Clark Kent?

You might not send your kids to school when they are sick or go to work when you are ill, that is commendable. But that is hardly the norm.

And sorry but we'll have to 'agree to disagree' on how germs are spread. Having worked in offices for 15 years now I've seen illnesses make the rounds through the company many, many times.

As far as the "planet over-populating ass clowns" remark, no offense intended (to you at least), but the ass raping of the environment is something I care about, and if you don't think Earth is over-populated and getting worse by the day you are pretty naive. The population of India grows by a million people a year. When species such as gorillas, pandas and elephants are no longer found in the wild during our lifetimes due to loss of habitat maybe you'll see where I'm coming from.

[Creepy]

Ahhh, how I love a good debate!

Steph I think the fact that your son doesn't go to daycare or attend school might explain why he's only been sick a couple of times.

[Rhi]

I am hardly sick. I can count on one hand (other than sinus's) the times I have been sick in the last few years, so I attribute it to good genes.

[Creepy]

I agree, good genes could play a role in that. But most people get sick on a more regular basis than you.

[Stephanie]

I'm not going to go for the 'debate' part of this because frankly, I don't have all of the information I would need to properly debate. With that aside--I will say that using India as an example is odd. There are so many factors, esp. religion, that have to do with 'breeding'. Some religions don't allow any form of birth control--the United States, thankfully, doesn't hold a majority in that crowd.

As for my son not attending daycare/school and that being a reason as to why he rarely gets sick; I agree. Breastfeeding is also a huge factor in that--and I do have the resources and knowledge to back that up if you would care to debate that topic. Yet I digress; my son is out in public most days, for most parts of the day. He does attend the children's gym at the YMCA and plays with children who do attend daycare/school. I doubt genes play a role in this instance because his father and I were pretty sickly little tykes. I'm just one of 'those' moms who carry around sanitizing wipes, makes him wash his hands a million times a day, and goes through Lysol at home like it's going out of style.

[Creepy]

Yes, the U.S. allows birth control, but people are still breeding like rabbits (our population growth rate is .92%).

As far as your son rarely getting sick, I would consider you and Rhi to be in the minority. Most people I know's kids get sick a few times a year. Anyone else with kids care to weigh in on this..?

[Bruce]

Tell her to go and get CutePDF (http://www.cutepdf.com/) It allows you to create a PDF file out of any document that you can send to a printer. And its free!!!!
Judi, you have a great case. I think people with kids are given far too much latitude. As a father of 2 young girls (2 and 4) I feel I have the right to say that having kids is not a miracle. Amazingly enough, people do it all the time. Now please do not jump on my me about people who want to have kids and I can't. I feel terrible about that. But our society seems to praise people simply for doing what comes naturally. I do not believe in the miracle of birth. But maybe I am just a cold hearted bastard.
To Steve's point about being sick, I think I can count on both hands the total days I stayed home from school through out my 12 years, and one of those occasions was 5 days with chicken pox. Yet in the last 4 years, I have been sick on a regular basis. Not sick as in emergency room trips, but stupid things I have never had before like ear infections, stomach bugs, and frequent colds and coughs. Steve can I get a witness about that ridiculous cough I had that lasted for weeks!!!!! As a foreigner, I would love to say it is an environmental thing (swamp gas and all this anti-bacterial soap and household cleaner that is only spreading up the evolutionary changes in the bacteria) but I lived here for 4 years before we had kids and I was not as sick prior to the arrival of Rowen. And it only increased once she started going to pre-school. Kids get sick "all" the time because their immunity is still developing and 3 and 4 years olds do not practice the personal hygiene adults do. They are still learning.
Any way, that's just my opinion. I could be wrong.

[Bruce]

Steph, spot on about the breast feeding!!!! Kate breast fed both girls for 9 months and I think it has helped. But without a doubt the frequency of illness in our household has increased since Rowen started going to pre-school. I wish you all the best of luck with your son.
And I feel I must throw this in. I do not consider us a sickly househols. Of course everything is relative, but compared to our friends we seem to escape most things that go around. I would say someone (usually Rowen or Fiona) is sick about 3 times a year.

[PinkLady]

Ok fuckity, I'll weigh in. Lennon's rarely sick either. Call it luck, call it good genes, call it whatever the hell you like. I think the last time I was sick was in March, and that's because Dumbfuck got me sick. That being said, when I'm around sick people, I get pissed off. Stay the fuck home and stay the fuck away from me. My nephew, who is 8, is ALWAYS sick. At least once a month this child is sick. WTF?

[Creepy]

My point exactly Pink: if you're sick stay the fuck home and away from me. You're being a selfish, inconsiderate prick.

And I still think that kids going to school when they are sick is a major cause of illnesses spreading as far and wide as they do...

[Stephanie]

So--we all agree that if you're sick, or your kids are sick, stay home. Right? Good. Any person with a lick of sense would know that.

Now--as for parents getting breaks at work due to sick children and all that...well, I can't say much there. What I can say is that as a SAHM, I get NO sick days. My husband can't run home and take care of me or our son when I'm sick because he has to work. If he doesn't work, he gets fired. The news doesn't wait. For four months after my son was born I was feeling like I was knocking on death's door. When they finally figured out what the hell was wrong with me and I had emergency surgery, my husband had to take vacation time (he had used his sick days and a week of vacation when we brought the baby home) to take care of me. Had it been our son who was sick--he would have gotten paternity time. That's crap. I agree that it's bullshit that parents get breaks simply because their parents. Just like smokers get more breaks. Just like the rich get tax breaks. C'mon. The system is fucked up and we all know it.

As for over population in the United States--that's a fault on the personal level. If these f'ing KIDS would stop having kids, we'd be a bit better off. If people took the time to think before having sex--we'd be better off. Birth control is damn easy to get hold of. All this BS I hear from people about 'natural family planning' and 'I can't afford it' or 'It makes me sick'...use a damn condom. NFP is good and all, if you know what the hell you're doing. If you don't--pull & pray, baby! If I hear one more friend telling me that they're expecting their 12th kid because their partner got 'too into it' I'll f'ing scream. Use a hand. Use a mouth. Use a sock for all I care. "It" doesn't need to go "there" just because it's convenient. There's a reason I never got pregnant before my husband and I were ready....and I'm not the sharpest crayon in the box. If I can avoid pregnancy; anybody can.

Ahh..I feel better now. Ü

[Creepy]

Yes Steph, I think we all agree on something: if you're sick stay home; your kids are sick keep them home.

I'm not sure I'm ready to get into the kids having kids and welfare isssues. Not tonight at least...