Open up and say "Aaah"

While having my teeth cleaned by the dental hygienist this morning I couldn't help but think I had somehow ended up on the set of a porno:

"Open your mouth."

"Wider."

"Even wider."

"Turn your head towards me."

"Keep your mouth open wide, just like that."

"Move your tongue."

"Spit."

And being handed a cup of mouthwash at the conclusion didn't exactly shatter the illusion.

Although when 'Mr. Thirsty' (the hook-shaped suction device hung from the side of your mouth) got caught underneath her chair as she rolled backwards away from me I momentarily snapped out of my haze; just in time to prevent myself from being yanked to the floor.  Now I know what a game fish goes through while on the end of a rod and reel.  Talk about your largemouth ass.