"Just slide, glide, slippity-slide"
This Wednesday I'll be part of my own fantastic voyage, as I undergo my first ever colonoscopy (hopefully with lots of sliding, gliding and slippity-sliding courtesy of copious amounts of lube). The cat scan taken in the hospital revealed no abscesses but my gastro doc wants to take a good look inside the colon to make sure there are no polyps or any other malevolent entities. Who knew turning 40 would make me feel so old.
Shit, even the GI makes me feel old -- for the first time in my life I'm seeing a doctor who is younger than me. And he's much younger than me at 32.
Anyway, the crew of the fantastic voyage should have one of their more interesting experiences, what with the giant Ouija board tattooed on my back. Maybe I'll bring in a planchette with me so they can have some fun while probing my colon. At least more fun than usual.
Don't mention the tattoo but walk in, hand them a planchette and don't tell them why.
Posted by: Larry "The Snake Guy" | May 02, 2009 at 01:01 PM
Oh yeah, I forgot to mention. While it looks cool the way it is, I keep thinking the board should be upside down. It kind of looks like it was intended for use by someone who's behind you while you're bent over. :)
Posted by: Larry "The Snake Guy" | May 02, 2009 at 01:04 PM
It's a Ouija board, not a pair of tits you sick fuck!
Posted by: Creepy | May 02, 2009 at 04:33 PM
OH WOW!!! IF WITCHES FIND OUT THAT YOU HAVE THAT ON YOUR BACK,THEY'RE GOING TO FUCK WITH YOU SOOOOOOOOOO BAD!! PREPARE TO FUCKED IN THE ASS BY THE SATAN!!!
GLORIFIED!
Posted by: bITCH | November 09, 2009 at 02:08 AM
Oh, that's rich. Excuse me, I've got to go feed the invisible pink unicorn living in my backyard.
Posted by: CREEPY | November 09, 2009 at 09:05 AM
I was thinking, "Prepare to Be Fucked In the Ass By Satan" would be a killer album title for a rock 'n' roll band. Sodomized By Satan would be an awesome band name as well. Keep the great suggestions coming.
Posted by: CREEPY | November 11, 2009 at 11:14 AM
can we play on ur back?is thiz really work out?
Posted by: Unknown Soul | November 15, 2009 at 09:27 AM
Sure, no one has taken me up on the opportunity yet! Will it work? I guess we'll have to try to learn that.
Posted by: CREEPY | November 15, 2009 at 10:05 AM